Nice letter from Santorum

"Thank you for emailing me. I have detected, however, that your email message was not submitted through my website. Therefore, I am unable to process your email request. Please go to www.santorum.senate.gov and click on the "contact information" link and then select "Email Senator Santorum" at the bottom of the page. If you need further assistance, please feel free to contact my office at: 511 Dirksen Senate Office Building Washington, DC 20510

Telephone: 202-224-6324

Thank you again for contacting me."

SenatorSantorum@santorum.senate.gov

Lynn and Rudy on a raft out of town

Today's paper described a fundraiser in King of Prussia (where nobody lives) featuring America's mayor Giuliani stumping for Lynn Swann in the PA governor's race.

A quote: "somebody new...what we need in America right now."
Another quote: "When things aren't working, we need to bring in new people."

I agree we need a new president, the current one is too stupid and crooked, lacking character so acutely it's astonishing he got to where he is with sheer avarice.

But another telling line from the mayor: Lynn's candidacy helps to build the party."

Das Party. Again with building the party, again with ignoring the STATE of PA.

The Republican Party is about government failing people, and they have been successful elsewhere. We can't let them achieve defeat here.

I consider Swann the perfect candidate for the RNC: No experience, some name recognition, educated with the RNC three-week "How-to-campaign" course, briefed with the Cliffs' Notes, and bankrolled from out of state.

No Lynn Swann, and now Rudy Giuliani can go fuck himself.

Liars and tigers and Republicans- oh my!

Interest anybody that we've gone through at least 50 years without hearing about any forged documents, but when BushII came to town we got false AWOL documents to prop up his image and fake spy docs indicating phony nuke sales to Saddam?

And now, the informants! Informants are everywhere. We're the police state we won the cold war fighting against.

Keep voting for Republican candidates, who can't govern. Vote for them despite their committment to undermining government. That's how you get your armageddon. It's a fantasy until you whip the unprincipled and untalented popularity merchants on the hill (pick a hill) into a stupid frenzy and they start firing missiles everywhere.

And because Bush's team seems to be ignoring the North Korean missile tests, assume it's important.

Swann? Lynn Swann? Really?

That PA Republicans had neither debates nor a real primary, looking to their Texas bosses instead of Pennsylvanians to choose their candidate for governor is more offensive than presenting a collecibles-peddling former celebrity as a reasonable choice. No company should consider an entry-level candidate for their executive position, even if he is famous in Pittsburgh.
The RNC is calling us stupid. PA Republicans are being asked to help them execute their plan to diminish government through careful promotion of incompetence and meticulous disregard for common good.

Joe Matthews

GOP Liar Coward Pansies

I apologize to any honest, pious pansies offended by this post. You are not included in this slur.)

Are you a Republican? An Eisenhower Republican or an Eisner Republican? Living in modern USA or Post-modern Hometown, Disney? Are you distracted by your crooked down-south business dealings and social Cleansing, or did you help the whole world win a just war and caution your countrymen about the amoral overthrow of your government by business politics? Do you support cynical and unamerican behavior at home, or only as part of your foreign policy?

Newsweek got some bad info and riots killed dozens.

GOP lied and Iraq II killed thousands of Americans and tens of thousands of Iraqis.

Newsweek apologized.

That's why we're in such a state. The personal responsibility party is also the zero-liability party. If nothing else, TORT reform is certainly carte blanche for somebody. Not you, but somebody must want it. Imagine suing someone who cuts off the wrong hand. Now imagine having no recourse at all.

Lying, evasive, cowardly, weak, pale, idolatrous, impious, pansy Republicans. That's who wants tort reform.

(Republicans don't understand the world of today due in part to their platform of stoic adherence to ignorance of the world as is happens. We just went back in time to speak the language of Das Good-Ol' Party in calling them names likely to anger them most. My parents were among the first to grow up with television, and almost nobody in national government is a Veteran- though almost everybody in the country is a baby-boom kid from the same cohort. In the 1950s, when their social utopia was realized-- if only on television, 'sissy' and 'pansy' were much worse than 'fag', which apparently didn't exist in the Republican-spun Golden Age of Nixon. I apologize to any honest, pious pansies offended by this post. You are not included in this slur.)

Republican National Committee

markets itself as a non-profit, just like Tom DeLay's charities, Rick Santorum's charities, UNICEF and Habitat for Humanity. But there's an important difference.

Although anyone has a right to ask their representatives to support or fight a piece of legislation, those RNC assholes pay themselves to lobby themselves.

Lobbyist organizations like Abramoff's, Ralph Reed's, Santorum's, Pat Robertson's, etc. really ought to pay taxes to support their right to exercise rights in a free country, where everything's free only if you don't pay for it.

So the RNC sent me a nonprofit postage-paid voter registration form with Smirky G on the front. Some banners:
"Winning the War on Terror", although we've had to admit terrorist incidents have risen drastically under Bush and since Iraq.
"Securing our Borders" by granting Dubai-based shipping company access to our territory.
"Growing our Economy" by swelling mortgages and credit debt, transferring resources free-of-charge to profitable companies like Exxon.
"Restraining Government Spending" on some things like help for people or quality of lives, but in the aggregate spending more than anyone in history.

It goes on to cite record-low unemployment, meaning it's good to lose your job and take two to replace your salary. Obligations don't go away, especially since they've changed bankruptcy law from the easy pass it was when GWB got his.
Disingenuous, the count isn't based on hired people, just people no longer looking for work.

MoveOn and PFAW solicit input from Americans from time to time. WHat should they do to help save the democracy? Attack. Perhaps the most serious issue in the 2006 elections should be the lies, theft and ulterior motivation of the ruling party and its membership, who clearly must profit.

Not-for-profit my ass!

(I deliberately renamed Ralph Reed as Rex a few years ago, intending to merge the two identities: The useless, effeminate and somehow slightly popular Rex is a movie critic. Ralph is the useful, effeminate tool of the Armageddonist anti-Free Nazi Party of Faith, with illegal fraud money income, lobbyist cash, more access to your representatives than you, and probably a slightly sore asshole from the time he 'tried it' in college.)

Those wacky oil prices and ports

When Oil hit a record $58/barrel, I stopped driving. I have a diesel automobile. It weighs thousands of pounds, and still gets better mileage than an SUV.

I stopped driving because, as a representative of Bush's jobless 'recovery (recovering from unprecedented plenty and prosperity)', I started my own business doing what I know how to do. And my family needs me to make good decisions. Like not paying $3/gallon for fuel or invading a country because I'm an asshole. Even though I'm an asshole, I won't invade your country without a reason, without a plan.

That's what happened that day. Fuel shot up in price to $3/gallon. Gasoline went up first, but then leveled off a little lower than diesel. Diesel fuel seems like simple unrefined petroleum to me. Certainly costs less to make. But $3. Overnight!

Now oil fetches a groovy $68/barrel, and the price of diesel in my market is back down to $2.65. Not a big deal, but certainly doesn't reflect economics.

How did the fuel companies make the record profits last year, even given the surge in raw material costs? I drove less. So did you. Demand went DOWN. Prices went up. A lot. I remember a cozy $1.25/gallon Clinton price. But when the world heard of the disputed US election in 2000 and foreign investment slowed, US operations of foreign companies like every drug maker on earth stopped research projects. And the oil companies represented by our President and his Men made big bucks.

It couldn't have been all the free real estate and mining rights passed out by the Republicans in government, that happened after all the bucks.

Perhaps there's an election dividend at work. They got their money, they're getting about the same per gallon, but it's a symbolic suspension of the raw rules of supply and demand working to keep our high fuel prices lowish while the Republicans run for cover under the smoke provided by the now-successful quagmire in Iraq and the kind blown up asses by the liberal media.

We're from Texas: You OWE Us!

Perfect, huh? It sounds so right. It agrees with everything we've seen for the past 5 years. Look out America, here comes Texas.

Texas, where the ubercrooked Tom (Developmental) DeLay used laundered money to create extra Congressional seats for the Texas delegation. Texas, home of lots of dirty Abramoff swindles and even the 'holy' Rex Reed's dirty fingerprints. Texas, where Jesus is in charge, and Satan leads the charge.

What am I talking about? This morning on CNN, I watched some footage of the previous night's Mardi Gras festivities, replete with a filthy Texas family carrying a sign in struggling New Orleans:
We're from Texas.
You OWE Us!

Anthemic, right? The Great Satan itself, descending upon us all in the guise of a state where most of the church-going happens, none of the forebearance and free charity.

I hereby invite Texas to secede from the Union. We get most of our oil from Canada, and most of our hairspray harlots, Sunday-school sluts, birdie-hunting empty-headed he-men and way, way too much talk.

Oops- forgot to mention the poseur Bush. Mr. Connecticut.

We owe them nothing but the back of our hand. Fuck Texas and the assholes it rode in on.

I want to be a Republican

Yes, I wish I were a Republican. It's got to be easy- the answers are all so easy-sounding, especially when we don't have to resolve them with the world around us.

I wish I could support turning over Republican House Ethics to the Republican Executive Branch's Justice Department. That would be great.

I wish I could tear out a few lines of the Constitution, to better enable the Government to protect what's left.

I wish I were able to plausibly deny on television what I can't simply avoid talking about.

I wish I could revel in my psychotic anti-community paranoia, expecting the psychotic neighbors to also be Republican and therefore supportive of my psychotic anti-communityism.

I wish I could say with a straight face that torture, deceit, graft and downright theft are okay, as long as it's a politician and not ever a free individual. In fact, I wish I could hope the government would database us all and round up the diseentors so we could be truly free to eat each other's throats in peace, albeit conflict.

One thing and its opposite are friends of mine. I believe them both, but only enough to say so. I really have no heart or mind. Oops- I'm already a Republican! Nooooooo!

Oh boy, here we are again still.

This is it. I'm coming back. We stopped posting when the spammer idiot pansies contaminated the blog with their simpleminded alternative to work.

I'm posting this small thing now to ping the thing that causes them to come. Then I will act to prevent it. Comments will be moderated if I can swing it, and if I can't we'll go offsite, to:

http://www.SundayMail.org

If you're articulate, angry about the campaign of ignorance, fear and failure the 'conservative' bowel movement is trying to enforce as the status quo, I invite you to contact me about participating. We'll schedule events, promote candidates, and we'll be sure to stuff a thumb into the eye socket of anyone who stares at the TV too long, sucking up all the garbage spewed by O'Really?, Faggity and the rest of the know-nothing parrots. Remember, they're TV stars in TV shows.

That's enough for now.

Wish me luck,
Joe

PS- if we can get some donations together we'll get a host.

Pat Robertson is my favorite

So what does he say?

I mean, when the millions of peasants picking through the rubble of his beloved tornado-infested midwest ask why God keeps punishing them with natural disasters, what does this fuckheaded tax-dodger charlatan lie to them about, besides the sins of others bringing God's traditionally irrelevant wrath upon the red-state faithful?

Maybe he tells them to go assasinate foreing authorities. Like Chavez.

When he tells me Dover, PA deserves natural disasters for electing to teach science in science class and refusing to admit social engineering nonsense into the math and science curriculum, I say he deserves a 50-year back-tax bill for his insanely profitable charlatanry.

Fuck Pat Robertson. He needs to be lobotomized and deported. To Sodom. Where Pat Robertson should be fucked in the ass until he dies. And he should be kept alive by science so he can be fucked in the ass for a few extra years.

And the empty-headed silly, misguided fools posting spam to my blog should be in charge of licking up the effluent.

Pat Robertson is my favorite

So what does he say?

I mean, when the millions of peasants picking through the rubble of his beloved tornado-infested midwest ask why God keeps punishing them with natural disasters, what does this fuckheaded tax-dodger charlatan lie to them about, besides the sins of others bringing God's traditionally irrelevant wrath upon the red-state faithful?

Maybe he tells them to go assasinate foreing authorities. Like Chavez.

When he tells me Dover, PA deserves natural disasters for electing to teach science in science class and refusing to admit social engineering nonsense into the math and science curriculum, I say he deserves a 50-year back-tax bill for his insanely profitable charlatanry.

Fuck Pat Robertson. He needs to be lobotomized and deported. To Sodom. Where Pat Robertson should be fucked in the ass until he dies. And he should be kept alive by science so he can be fucked in the ass for a few extra years.

And the empty-headed silly, misguided fools posting spam to my blog should be in charge of licking up the effluent.

Howard Stern is a Bastard

I've been pissed off about the theft of our airwaves, having been forever swapped for some beads and a stinky blanket from Australia. Not even a Mexican blanket.

So I've been looking forward to life after Howard Stern. I first heard him in ~1985 or 1986. It was as if I got into a party at the young neighbors' house, with my parents and all their friends actually having a conversation. And joking- people were laughing about stuff. And they were being silly the way my uncle was silly sometimes. A daily shot of the rare honest moment in company. You may have heard he's leaving FM radio.

I resent the notion I ought to pay to be on an advertising drip. Like we're in the nursing home, every one of us with a media outlet receiver is paying a tax and a monthly fee to lie in our filth and watch the contrived lives of others. I like a good sitcom, but since I don't watch Fox I can't watch the only good one. Don't remind me about cartoons. Since Fox owns a piece of the filthy Family Guy, I might not really be able to watch that. Waiting for a sign on that one.

But now there's satellite. And Stern's going. And he said there's a weekly serial Fartman coming. And I feel comfortable he and his writing staff are still sufficiently insulated from taste, but with a better pool of idiots. And I needed a new radio anyway.

Bastard.

Oxford, PA Council Members for Retirement

Per Open Secrets.Org, here is a sitting council member from my home town of Oxford:

WARE, JOHN H MR IV
OXFORD,PA 19363
RETIRED
1/13/2005
$2,000
Republican National Cmte

In Shreveport, LA, a Norman Kinsey has about $30K in to the thugs, with a wad coming from each company he 'works'.

We have a month to put these RNC pinheads out of 'work'.

Joe

George Will

For a long time, I've listened to Mr. Will, helf the time calling him an asshole. We won't agree on everything, but in principle I have to say I understand him. And that he's right better than half the time.

Now I'm at a loss. He said anyone supporting the Miers nomination to the Supreme Court is not Presidential material. I agree, and am surprised to hear Mr. Will supporting the argument I've been making all along: Bush is not presidential material.

Thanks George,
Joe

Below C Level

The infra-achieving President of the United States has brough mediocrity to a new low. With no standards for appointments whatsoever, he's relying simply on the carte blanche he's given by the GOP in the Congress to get his evil plans done.

And now he's appointing some fucking miscellaneous lawyer to the Supreme Court of the United States. It's no longer disinterest, his attitude has achieved obvious contempt.

After turning our fine nation into a Keystone Cops farce by sending the populations of several cities to the bottom of the ocean, and then several hundred miles north, then back, and then back north again, sending perishable trucked ice arriving in New Orleans to Maine for storage in a GOP-donor freezer (Americold or some shit), blowing thousands of gallons of now-precious fuel to keep the ice cold for the trip, after letting his asshole buddy Brownie stand up and blame others for his ignorant non-serious approach to sucking cash from the US public for whom the GOP has a nasty sanchez, it's time for us to blame ourselves for letting you vote for that piece of shit.

Coming soon: Pilleggi and Hershey voted for the ill-conceived PA government pay raise, and they have to be fired for it.

Joe

For the want of a nail

Two new nails in the coffin of our democracy are being driven right now by the Republican government. At stake is the independence of the states, and the freedom of individuals. The important question is this: Do we exist to support the state, or does the state exist to guarantee freedom and justice to individuals?

Pace Comitatus means the central government can't enforce its will in local law enforcement. It means the US government can't go to Boston to arrest people guilty of being gay and married.

DNA Database compulsory on arrest violates the fifth amendment's protection against compulsory testimony on behalf of the state, and violates the fourth amendment's prohibition of unreasonable search and siezure. But this time the item being siezed is the essence of the person being searched.

Strict construction my ass! WHich one of you assholes is voting Republican next time?

How to improve a fuel economy

A petroleum economy rapidly nearing cataplexy, the United States was last week the scene of a terrible scam. The government found a use for all those black people: Tell them that everyone along the gulf coast has to drive a hundred miles north.

At $4/gallon.

And maybe drive back (You'll have to rent a space to stay while you mop out the new swimming pool where your basement, heater, water heater, winter clothes, tools, packed-up memorobilia used to be. Now all that stuff is a blob. It would have taken about three days to pack it all up and ship it to your brother's house in New York for a few weeks. And it took weeks to arrive.) if the evacuation order is lifted. Can you stay in the city overnight? Luckily, everyone in Louisiana has one of those swamp boats, so you can still commute.

Guess 1 million trucks averaging 20 mpg. That's 5,000,000 gallons, about $20,000,000. And that's 5,000,000 gallons off the top of our national reserve. And back south makes 10,000,000 gallons.

Clinton would have had airlifts assembling DURING the storm.

But seriously, the Hurricanes

I was in New Orleans once, and it was around 2pm on a Tuesday. I was, oddly, the only one walking around without my very own hurricane. Everyone around me was steeped in the local lore, everybody knows the berms are there to keep reality out.

And we're going to rebuild it on its foundation. Under sea level. Because George Bush is in charge and nothing matters. Decisions are being made by political appointees with less success in their backgrounds than even the failure W.

Old-time religion, modernity, and sea level

Wow, can you imagine what it would have been like a hundred years ago, before doppler radar, satellite tracking and a National Hurricane Center? If a category 4 hurricane would have hit New Orleans, at the mouth of the Mississippi River?

For some reason, it would have been about the same, only with less damage, because George Bush is in charge and he is an asshole and his followers are unprepared, ill-thought out idiots.