Yes, I wish I were a Republican. It's got to be easy- the answers are all so easy-sounding, especially when we don't have to resolve them with the world around us.
I wish I could support turning over Republican House Ethics to the Republican Executive Branch's Justice Department. That would be great.
I wish I could tear out a few lines of the Constitution, to better enable the Government to protect what's left.
I wish I were able to plausibly deny on television what I can't simply avoid talking about.
I wish I could revel in my psychotic anti-community paranoia, expecting the psychotic neighbors to also be Republican and therefore supportive of my psychotic anti-communityism.
I wish I could say with a straight face that torture, deceit, graft and downright theft are okay, as long as it's a politician and not ever a free individual. In fact, I wish I could hope the government would database us all and round up the diseentors so we could be truly free to eat each other's throats in peace, albeit conflict.
One thing and its opposite are friends of mine. I believe them both, but only enough to say so. I really have no heart or mind. Oops- I'm already a Republican! Nooooooo!
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