Thank you Stentor Santorum!

(Stentor is a filter-feeding aquatic microorganism. It attaches itself to a piece of rot where the circulation of fresh water gives it plenty of fuel to sustain itself. Like Rickypoo, it is a bottom-feeder and its peers are slime.)

According to a giant billboard in Philadelphia, Ricky helped defeat Colo-Rectal Cancer. My aunt, a PA native has been living abroad for a while, in Texas and now Virginia. She got it anyway. But fact-based reality won't affect Ricky. Three important things should.

1) Instead of arguing about when to pull out of the RNC frat party in Iraq, they keep steering it back to 'whether'. That's unfortunate. As Ricky himself shrieks, Mahmoud Ahmedinijad speaks for Iran, which is a psycho. Let's sketch the 'When' discussion. Will we pull out of Iraq now, while it's a mess, or in ten years, when it's a mess? I'm asking because unlike Mahmoud, Iran's going to be there for a long time. And with 70% of the Iraq population, any increase in democracy swings power to Shiites. The only Shiite state in the world is our dear enemy Iran, which already holds more social sway there than we do. On behalf of Iran, let me thank Sentator Santoru, Reps Joe Pitts and Gerlach for doing their part on behalf of the people of PA to ensure they have smooth roads, running water and stable electricity when the Ayatollas come to take possession of the second-biggest oil reserve we've also taken the trouble of plumbing for them. That's one thing that should matter to ol' Rickypoo, but it's beyond him.

2) I heard it first from President Bush, but Ricky repeated it passionately at the PA Press Club: Those IOUs in a file drawer in Virginia (he should know) are worthless. The IOUs are actually US Treasury Bonds, for decades the most stable investment in the world. They are what Social Security owns. They are what the Chinese government buys when they bankroll the small-government party's voracious pork diet. Before Bush, government jobs were pretty good, but now it's the only way for Bush to hide unemployment: Hire people to work for the government. Sure, right now there are relatively few informants and secret police. But as we've known all along, open markets change society. And we're taking so much from China it's only a matter of time. Either we learn to speak Chinese, or we'll end up having to repay some of the worthless IOUs in the file drawer. Debt matters, China matters, and the government's role in the economy matters to me and other Pennsylvanians, but with his US-Government pension, he's beyond worry.

3) Investigations probably do matter to Rickypoo. We built an infrastructure in Iraq, but not in Afghanistan where Bin Laden's gang lived and trained. With no oil revenues ever, they have no exports or indigenous industry and actually needed the help. We accomplished our Iraq mission, according to the President several years ago, but still we wage war. Is that the mission? Santorum, Gerlach and Pitts are going to have to explain where the money went when 'Fuckoff' Dickie's ol' boys got the Iraq job and stole billions of dollars from the Treasury they all mean to drain. Hurricane Katrina wandered slowly north from the tropics, and the Republican FEMA (Financing Exotic Millionaire Acreage) did nothing to help these blue black states. Terry Schiavo was headed for peace, and the entire government showed up and worked late to write laws against natural death.

Politics is about priorities. Ricky and his childish dimwit friends in the RNC have prioritized lionizing Iran, turning Korea into a bogeyman we are powerless to affect, pouring the country's current and future treasure into vanity wars, strengthening communist regimes, expanding the size while diminishing the strength of government and throwing money around like it's theirs over improving the conditions for freedom and prosperity in their home states. And now Iran is stronger, Korea more desparate. China and Cuba are no longer the only remaining Red states. They're screwing up the whole world.

Give that funny-head slanted grinner a retarded test.